From DIDI to AUNTY

Today an incident happened that forced me to think of the characteristics of the women I called ‘Aunty” my whole life. Not ‘Aunt’, but ‘Aunty’. You guessed right. A kid on the street called me ‘Aunty’!!! Right, I’m mortified.

Don’t do unto others…and that’s how the saying goes…I called Mom’s friends ‘Aunty’ all the time. I called her boss that, I called her few thousand relatives that…when I forgot what they were actually supposed to be called. I called any lady in a sari that. Called our household help that. Called my friends’ moms that. In fact to this day, at a ripe old age of…ok never mind…I still call those women ‘Aunty’. When I was younger, it applied to ladies above 30 I suppose, mainly married, with kids. Women in salwar-kameezes were generally ‘Didi’. To think that the kids in the neighborhood where I grew up, are calling me that! I’m not fat, I’m not married, and I don’t have kids! I don’t go to kitty-parties, I don’t wear saris, I don’t cook. I dress crisp, I have short hair, and no mehndi. None ever on my hands either. I don’t wear worn-out kolhapuris, I speak with a slight accent, I don’t spend hours in the beauty parlor! Never spent hours in the winter sun outside in the park either, with more ‘Aunties’, knitting, peeling oranges, and shouting at the kids occasionally. I have never worn jewelry beyond a pair of studs in my ear and a chain around my neck. Am not centered, focused, holier-than-thou. Oh, did I say I’m not fat?

It’s sad that I based my judgments solely on appearances. I’ve learnt my lesson! But the kid today could not have based her judgment on my appearance! I should not be subject to this agony of being likened to women who did all of the above, whom I called ‘Aunty’. I vow to not call anyone that from this day forward. Aunty mat kaho na!